American Inventor: not so much

***
Design Flaws in American Inventor

1. All that tedious backgrounding on the judges. None of the audience cares about the qualifications of the judges. Trust me. We all have short attention spans. We've only tuned in to see the wackos.

2. How judge Mary Lou Quinlan (I had to look up her name) wears that cobalt blue that all redheads were once told really lifts their complexions and makes their eyes snap. Also how she seems constantly on the verge of tears.

3. Mind-numbing overuse of the word 'dream'. As has been eloquently noted elsewhere.

4. The structure of the show itself. When someone sings, it's a unique event. They can sing again later, and might improve. Or they might struggle with, oh, say remembering the words to a Stevie Wonder song. But each time their performance will be a little different, and whether they dance, skate, design clothing, or model, the same principle applies. However, when someone reveals an invention... well, they reveal it. They pull the sheet off, and you see it, and you go 'ah, that's clever... yeah, great'. Ummm... (insert sound of crickets chirping...)

Since seeing the invention blows the suspense, last night's two hour American Inventor episode used a lot of the following instead:

a) shots of city skylines;
b) shots of clouds going past city skylines;
c) shots of line-ups of would-be inventors;
d) sound bites of people talking about their dreams;
e) discussion of the greatness of America and the American dream;
f) montage sequences of people coming out of the judging room;
g) did I mention dreams?

5. The bit when at-odds-with-everyone inventor and judge Doug Hall (yep, looked him up too) turned down that really adorable kid who invented the doggie-car-air-conditioner, then had one of those nauseatingly condescending 'encouraging adult' conversations with him later on. I'm sure the kid wanted to punch him, because I certainly did. Ref. #1 above, re knowing your audience - methinks that the show lost a chunk of viewers at this point. (Simple rule of reality TV: don't crap on engaging kids, or dogs. Never crap on both.)

6. How we were told not once, but several times, that Doug Hall was responsible for approximately eighteen inventions in the average American home. Ever hear what they were? No, me neither. Wanting to know would be intellectually curious, and we can't have that in a show like this.

7. Excruciatingly bad incidental music.

8. Ubiquitous British judge wasn't the mean one! Way to destabilise us!

9. Constant hyperbole about the Great American Dream was undercut by the fact that real, honest creativity frequently lost out to marketable, televisually appealing, producer-approved inventions and inventors. An olive pit bowl? C'mon, guys...

10. Here's another handy tip! If your show is all about invention and creativity, how about using a format that isn't EXACTLY LIKE EVERY OTHER REALITY SHOW. With all those supposedly brilliant minds on board, could no one come up with a new way to run the competition? To package the show? To reel in viewers? It doesn't say much for an ENTIRE FRIGGIN' SERIES ABOUT INNOVATION when you can't get past the MOST TIRED FORMAT in all of television. Hmm. Feel free to take that on board, American Inventor. I haven't patented the observation yet, but I feel you could get a lot of use out of it.